09 April 2005

I should of got out of bed when I awoke at 7. Then I would of had a drop on the situation. I would of been fully concious for at least a couple of hours and well prepared for the incoming onslaught. Instead I had a spliff and dozed a while longer.

The thing about being dysfunctional in a dysfunctional family drowning in debt is;
being in one is being trapped in a deep gravity well, standing on top of a singularity. You know everything is going to cave in eventually, and that if you don't leave you'll be condensed into an infinitesimally small point in space-time, but you can't reach escape velocity, not because of gravity, but because of love and familarity.
Because your afraid of what will happen to those still trapped inside
and your afraid what will happen to you
once you get out.