l∅ckedinab∅x: lists are fun/lists are great/lists help you procrastinate

04 April 2005

lists are fun/lists are great/lists help you procrastinate

You woulda thought, what with three weeks half-term holiday, that the frequency of posts on this site would of increased. Well, you'd be wrong. I'm getting terribly apathetic towards this place, although that may be a general malaise, and as such l∅ckedinab∅x has become somewhat of the blog equiviliant of a ghost-town, or at least it's getting there. There are three options in my eyes as to its fate;

carry on in this lathargic fashion, like a lame donkey that should probably be shot , and would be, if you weren't kinda fond of its grey, limping ass (no pun intended...maybe).
blast the place off the ether; thus putting an end to a personal project that has lasted way longer than any other project of mine, leaving my mind time to focus without guilt on other things instead of waking up in the morning and staring blankly at it, checking the hits, reading the tagboard, and posting a couple of links in a halfarsed fashion.
Reinvent this place into something I once again find interesting and inspiring, moving l∅ckedinab∅x to the next level of something, whatever that something may be.

I foresee something between 1. and 3. Thing is, I need focus to pull number 3 off, and right now I've got less focus than a mallrat on californian orange multi-tasking between watching MTV cribs, listening to avril lavange, and txting hir legions of prepubescent hoardes about the latest altpop hearthrobs and whether or not they're getting fat and spotty when they should really be doing their maths homework.

I've got way too much going on in my head, a side-effect of me trying to be superproductive, but instead of this resulting in me getting shit done its turned me into even more of a procrastinator. Things I've thought about doing/have to do;

write ambitious essay on secretary using the superdense writings of michel foucault as a focal point of the analysis.
write dissertation proposal; I'm doing mine on a compare/contrast of french new wave and generation X cinema focusing on a historipolicultural context.
start up alternative 'alternative' club night.
write remaining scenes for howl adaptation; gotta write adverts and gameshow scenes, maybe some pseudopenuniversity style stuff too.
help local mosherkids make music video
reinvent l∅ckedinab∅x into student/independant/guerilla film-making portal and collective home for myself and my handful of extremely talented and creative friends, thus making it something concrete and serious.
help some other guy from grassroots make his film; I'm gonna be in front of the camera, not behind it.
Seriously work on my writing, from a non-filmaking perspective.

and so on. If I thought some more I could probably come up with more for the list. Unfortunately, it is the fact that the list exists that has me paralysed with fear; I can't seem to get past the 'ideas' stage, but I guess that's the real test, isn't it? Whether or not you can. The word 'life hurdle' springs to mind, although it probably shouldn't as having such a word in my mind would probably lead to more neurotic panicking. As much as it bugs me to admit it...

* ( dramatic pause ) *

my worst enemy is myself.

And now I must leave you, as I am bored of my own ramblings. See what I mean about the lack of focus? I should really go anyway, as I've gotta pile through Foucault's 'History of Sexuality vol.2' which is subtitled 'the uses of pleasure', I think. Man, I'm up to my fillings in dense academic sexicultipolitithinginess. Why couldn't I just of gone for something simple?

[qu∅tes]

"one helped oneself out of solitude reluctantly by laying hold of some little odd or end, some sound, some sight." Virginia Woolf, To The Lighthouse

[on cinematography] "After you have done a picture you forget everything you have ever known, so that you become a child again, or an infant or a void into which the new picture creates a whole new evolvement... So that you do not have to keep doing the same thing all over again. In other words you take what yourself back to ground zero. Of course you cannot unlearn what your brain knowns. But I mean it emotionally. I mean you just become scared again, as if you do not know anything... I never felt on top of it. I neverfelt that I knew so much that I could sit back with a cup of coffee and it would all turn out wonderful." - Conrad Hall

[on cinematography] "When the budget is minimal you are forced to look at light as you find it, and to make it look good." - Haskell Wexler

"Rock 'n' roll is like an attitude, it's not a musical form of a strict sort. It's a way of doing things, of approaching things. Like anything can be rock 'n' roll." - Lester Bangs

"The capitalist mind perceives the world purely in terms of material resources to be used for its benefit, to increase productivity and profit without thought of long-term consequences." - Daniel Pinchbec, Breaking Open the Head

"In shamanic cultures, synchronicities are recognised as signs that you are on the right path." - Daniel Pinchbec, Breaking Open the Head (excerpt), Book of Lies

"...reality is up for grabs, so learn the codes through which the narrative is crafted and participate in its unfolding." - Douglas Rushkoff

"Hiroshima and Nagasaki were atomized at a time when the Japanese were suing desperately for peace. The American leaders were acting with almost inconceivable treachery by denying that they had received requests for peace…The bombs were exploded on congested cities filled with civilians. There was not even the slightest military justification, because the military outcome of the war had been decided months earlier." - Dave Dellinger

"We're living in a new Beat time, in my view. And it's very difficult for us to hang on." - Tilda Swinton

"Pursue the small utopias: nature, music, friendship, intimate love." -The Fugs

"We have reconstructed the Tower of Babel, and it is a television antenna: a thousand voices producing a daily parody of democracy, in which everyone's opinion is afforded equal weight regardless of substance or merit." - Ted Koppel

"There are alot of things you have to sacrfice. It all depends on how deep you want to get into whatever your gig is. Whatever you're there for. So like the deeper you get into it the more sacrifices you have to do, maybe even on your personality or your outward this and that. I just dedicate my life to this whole art. You have to forget about what people say. If it's art or anything else, whatever you really, really dig doing, you have to forget about what people say about you sometimes. Forget about this or that-when you're supposed to die or when you're supposed to be living. You have to forget about all these things. You have to go on and be crazy. Craziness is like heaven. Once you reach that point of where you don't give a damn about what everybody else is saying you're going towards heaven. The more you get into it, they're goin' to say "Damn, that cat's really flipped out. Oh, he's gone now". But if you're producin' and creatin', you know, you're getting closer to your own heaven. That's what man's tryin' to get to, anyway." - James Marshall Hendrix

"With its totalizing claim, the system created the conditions for this horrible retaliation. The immanent mania of globalization generates madness, just as an unstable society produces delinquents and psychopaths. In truth, these are only symptoms of the sickness." - Jean Baudrillard

"If poetry is what you can't translate, as Robert Frost once suggested, then art is what you cannot define. Nevertheless, it's fun to try." - james monaco, 'how to read a film'

"This spectacle of banality is todays true pornography..." - Jean Baudrillard

"...today we live in a society in which spurious realities are manufactured by the media, by governments, by big corporations, by religious groups, political groups. We are bombarded with pseudorealities manufactured by very sophisticated people using very sophisticated electronic mechanisms." - Philip K. Dick

"There is in every madman a misunderstood genius whose ideas, shining in his head, frighted people and for whom delirium is the only solution to the strangulation that life has prepared for him." - Antonin Artaud

"The way to create art is to burn and destroy ordinary concepts and to substitute them with new truths that run down from the top of the head and out from the heart." - Charles Bukowski

"Tea heads are a sociable lot. Too sociable for my liking." - William S. Burroughs

l∅ckedinab∅x

04 April 2005

lists are fun/lists are great/lists help you procrastinate

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