I have admittantly spent the weekend hidden away in my room watching films and smoking some mighty fine greenery. This may seem quite anti-social but I think my anti- social side has been feeling somewhat neglected and it felt about time that I gave it the attention it so rightfully deserves.
I always used to have trouble with my own company, it seemed impossible to quiet those voices whose tongues quest for loose threads of stability to pull at, but I've been feeling so much better lately. Sometimes your mind just gets so fogged up with bullshit you need a kick in the teeth to clear your sight... Or maybe just a gentle reminder.
I've been pondering spirituality a little, but not in a lame way. I've been reading about the taoists and zen buddists in counterculture through the ages and they really do seem like interesting and valid paths. Also, I've been digging into the Book of Lies again (no, not this one) and pondering magickal things. Think I might attempt to create myself a custom system of beliefs and ethics, a DIY effort that borrows from other paths, designed to provide a unique apparatus through which to view and process the world that is in keeping with my nature. Off the top of my head I see little bits of Satanism (for that nietzschen-existential taste), Taoism, zen buddism (old skool flavour) and possibly some other bits and pieces all mixed together with that little shining light inside me that keeps things interesting. If nothing else it'll give me something to do over the summer. One thing is for sure though, I'm staying the fuck away from wiccans (long story, not to be told right now).
Great, there's another hour or so of my life slacked away dreamin' ideas. When will I ever learn that it is only through hard work, dedication, and doing what your told to do that you can get anywhere in this life? That it is only after you have given your soul to the various processes of society, in an act of total subserviancy, that you can assure your place in the kingdom of bullshit you so rightfully deserve.
Saaaaaaaaarcasm, like the corners of my miiiiiind....
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